It took me awhile to understand that there is no place where we get to where everything is perfect. There is nothing that is going to be better than, or take the place of this moment. There is only this moment. Sometimes the moment teaches us with pain, sometimes it brings complete pleasure, but every moment is a gift. My greatest sadness comes when I am unwilling to cherish the moment and I long for something that seems to me to be more than what I have right now.
And that yearning is almost always followed by a deep serving of realizing how incredibly ungrateful I am.
I have been given so much. I have had ups and downs and highs and lows.
I just needed to accept that is life. We all are going to have financial concerns, health issues, losses, disappointments, relationship problems, concerns around our employment … all of us, in different ways at different times. THAT is life. It is. You don’t get to buy your way out of anything and even if you can distract yourself for a short time with the things money can buy – it won’t sustain your soul as it longs for the things that make us all uniquely human. I had to learn to stop fighting life and wishing it away. Once I simply accepted it and worked with whatever was going on, the pain stopped.
I think that is the biggest realization of most of my life – that much of our pain is self inflicted and while we complain about so many things that happen, we don’t stop doing the things we do that create our own unhappiness. Once you do, you realize how needless it all was and that the biggest part of your failure to see that, was your unwillingness to listen … to yourself or anyone else.