I knew there had to be an answer.
My son gave it to me.
What a lot of people do not understand about me is that I ask questions, not because I want to say something bad about other people, but because I really need to understand how things happen. I know we all think differently and I just could not get my head around this one question.
How do people go to church every Sunday and sit there and hear all the lessons and messages of love, forgiveness and be kind to one another and not get it? How can they sit there and hear those messages when they live their lives acting superior to everyone else and being cruel and unfair to other people around them? I mean choose to be a bastard, but then why go to church? Wouldn’t its lessons get in the way of your life?
He said to me, they may be trying. They may want to, and perhaps they are not able to connect with the spirit in a way that changes their life.
I took that part for granted. I could not see that simple little connection.
When tragedy happens in our lives some people are broken open, while other people hunker down and pull themselves tighter behind a thick shell of unfeeling. Those that are broken open are teachable.
I can see now where there is real intent perhaps on the part of those who are so awful. I can find the place within me to offer understanding and compassion for their dilemma. I cannot imagine my life without being able to FEEL that connection of love and compassion, of unconditional love and yet it makes sense that for some people, they simply cannot. I am sure their life experiences explain why they are the way they are.
I am not trying to understand with the intent of wanting to excuse them for their behaviour … we are all responsible for our behaviour because despite what our life circumstances have been we make the choice each day as to what our actions will or won’t be. We choose to continue to be reactive to life or proactive. We choose to ignore working on ourselves or to realize that IS our life’s work.
It all comes together when we start to be honest with ourselves and start to take full responsibility for who we are and what we do. That is the only source of real power. Knowing who we are puts us in touch with the source of all power. We have to be honest with ourselves to access that place. When we stop blaming circumstances and others for who we are we begin to get how powerful we are because nothing can keep us from who we are and what we are meant to do unless we CHOOSE to focus on our excuses and stay hidden behind those stumbling blocks letting our fear immobilize us.
We may believe that we are experiencing others and situations and that this is life but the reality is that all we ever experience is ourselves. We experience how we are gathering that information (our physical senses) and how we are processing it (reacting to it by our thoughts and our feelings). We are not disembodied robots place in experiences, we are instruments and we each read our own instruments. It all comes back into how incredibly powerful we are and how we are capable of making different choices and thereby creating different outcomes.