“So each of us has a choice. You have a choice. Your thoughts can make you and the world around you suffer more or suffer less. If you want to create a more collegial, harmonious atmosphere in your… community, don’t start by trying to change other people. Your first priority should be to find your own quiet space inside so you can learn more about yourself. This includes getting to know and understand your own suffering. When your practice is solid and you’ve already harvested some of the sweet fruits of getting to know yourself, you can consider ways you can make more room to bring silence, deep looking, understanding, and compassion into your… community.” Thich Nhat Hanh
“Remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose one of these three options, and you must choose now. Then accept the consequences. No excuses. No negativity. No psychic pollution. Keep your inner space clear.” Eckhart Tolle
This morning I was sitting at my computer stewing over a minor problem that is probably not important to anyone but me, but had been weighing on my mind.
I was getting more frustrated. I wanted to spend my time writing but instead I was worrying and my worry was just taking me round and round in circles. I was grumpy. I was stuck.
And then this miniscule little fly thingy showed up and started doing what most flies seem to do with me …head for the eyeball, up the nose, or into the ear. You have no idea the envy I feel for those who seem to be able to confine flies to their faces or arms, in the closed areas where there is no access to your brain. I am sure they want to eat my brains. That is what my brother always told me and I believed him. Don’t tell me he was lying. If your force me to give up this then I have to give up the good things he told me, like once he said I was destined for greatness and I even though he was drunk, I need to believe that he saw something in me.
Usually I can make sweeping hand grabs at the little things and get them in short order but this one was clearly double jointed and escaped my every effort. It was so tiny that I could not follow it in the air and even though I have to accept it could have actually been a normal sized, or even very large fly, and it was my eyesight that failed me and made it impossible to catch him …. I just could not get the darn thing.
It was an all out launching of war in the room. It kept buzzing me and dropping on my skin for just a second and taking off and disappearing before I could even think about raising my hand to swat it. Every time I rearranged things and thought I could get writing, there it was again reminding me I was its prisoner.
After a few minutes I had surrendered any hope of being able to write and I was sitting in my chair swatting wildly in the air with both hands – each coming and going in different directions, standing up and sitting down and swearing trying to get the damn annoying little fly. And then I realized the window was open and my neighbour was standing in her yard looking over to the house with a look that kind of went somewhere between fear, mild horror, and real concern.
I closed the window as quietly as I could.
I got up and walked out of the room and got a drink of water and just looked out at the garden for a few minutes. One of my birds hopped down onto the back of one of our chairs to give me a little song and a head nod. It made me smile.
And when I came back into the office and sat down in my chair the little fly was gone.
Or perhaps it was just my attention on it that was gone.
Well played universe, well played.
“If you obsess over whether you are making the right decision, you are basically assuming that the universe will reward you for one thing and punish you for another.
The universe has no fixed agenda. Once you make any decision, it works around that decision. There is no right or wrong, only a series of possibilities that shift with each thought, feeling, and action that you experience.
If this sounds too mystical, refer again to the body. Every significant vital sign- body temperature, heart rate, oxygen consumption, hormone level, brain activity, and so on- alters the moment you decide to do anything… decisions are signals telling your body, mind, and environment to move in a certain direction.”
“If you obsess over whether you are making the right decision, you are basically assuming that the universe will reward your for one thing and punish you for another. The Universe has no fixed agenda. Once you make any decision, it works around that decision. That is not right or wrong.” Deepak Chopra
I am not an American. I am a Canadian living in Australia but I do understand that the guns in America and the push back by the American people is not as much about the guns as it is a symbol of their freedoms. I know many people in the rest of the world do not understand but I think sometimes we jump into the idea that all those who speak English are pretty much the same. You have to understand the American culture is different than even Canada. You have to be willing to see this from their eyes and accept it is not the same as it is in your country (wherever that is). This is their line in the sand. Do I wish they had rallied behind something else in the constitution like maybe equality? Yes. But they are rallying. It is their fight and I sense that for many, although there are those who are everyone’s worst nightmare about gun crazy hoodlums, they are more committed to the principle of keeping their dad’s old gun in the dusty cupboard in the basement than they are for the actual need for usage. Continue reading
I knew there had to be an answer.
My son gave it to me.
What a lot of people do not understand about me is that I ask questions, not because I want to say something bad about other people, but because I really need to understand how things happen. I know we all think differently and I just could not get my head around this one question.
How do people go to church every Sunday and sit there and hear all the lessons and messages of love, forgiveness and be kind to one another and not get it? How can they sit there and hear those messages when they live their lives acting superior to everyone else and being cruel and unfair to other people around them? I mean choose to be a bastard, but then why go to church? Wouldn’t its lessons get in the way of your life? Continue reading
When we are kids our parents put us into social situations and urge us to “get along” with the other children. We learn about “sharing” and “being nice.”
As we grow and mature those lessons broaden into understanding how to work with a group, how to fit in, how to be liked, how to be a good friend, a responsible person, a socially acceptable contributor to society.
We go through a series of life experiences where we are exposed to people we do not like or do not get along with and are challenged to figure it out, to quell our own wishes/opinions/needs for a greater good. Sometimes that is just keeping peace in the family, sometimes it is to keep a job and sometimes it is to keep from being thrown in jail. Continue reading
People struggle to say “no.” Women more so than men.
It comes from lack of self esteem. We do not consider our needs to be important enough to place them first. We have been raised with messages that have taught us that a “good” woman or a “nice” woman is self sacrificing and always thinks of the needs of others. Add to that a healthy dose of religion and the idea that we should always serve others and you have the recipe used to make most people miserably unhappy. Continue reading