Raising Children, It’s Not About You.

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Love this article:  This is How you Know You Raised A Good Kid.

It is interesting watching your children grow as adults.  I am amazed how little the details matter – like what kind of car they drive, what their partner looks like, or what they do for a living.  The things that give me the most pride is when i see them making choices that show they know how to love and to forgive.  When they are mistreated and they do not retaliate with cruelty, when they pu aside their needs and wants for the greater good of their own children . . . even if no-one else will ever know the sacrifice they made,…

Sadly, too often, children become weapons for one parent to use against the other.  The need to be right, to get revenge, to hurt someone like you feel you have been hurt, takes over and we can waste a life time teaching our children to hate and carry out our endless acts of revenge against their other parent.  Think about that.  Think about the legacy that leaves for the world and what kind of people those children are going to be.  Would you want your child to end up with one of them as a partner?

Please pay attention to the children who are being raised in broken homes and advocate for them.  Tell your child it is not acceptable for them to trash your grandchild’s parent in front of the child.  Tell them that a child needs to know they are loved by both parents.  Help your child, your friend, to grow up and do the right thing.  It strengthens and heals the children, allowing them a chance at being decent people with happy lives, and it can do the same for your child.  As wounded as they might be, hanging on to hate, and spending a lifetime championing that emotion, only cancers us all.

Who is Raising Our Children?

parental abuse

Our children have no way of really understanding how their parents sacrificed for them. Especially not in a war being fought in family courts with lies and parents and step parents bidding for children with money and privilege as if they are real evidence of love.

They aren’t.

A wide screen TV, no matter how cool the model, has never made up for the lack of real connection in people’s lives. It is, at best, a temporary distraction. They can never give a person purpose or grounding or ever feed their soul through the long dark night. Continue reading